PARENTHOOD

I had lunch today with a friend who’s a brand new mom. Her son turned one month old today. We were marveling at what a different world parenting is from that of non-parents. It’s the most difficult yet rewarding job a person could ever have. There’s a lot of trial and error involved. As parents, we try our best to do things right, yet, despite our best efforts, we sometimes get it so wrong. Plus, even when we think we’re doing everything right, you just never know what’s going on in the mind of your child, even when they’re grown.

As an example, my oldest son, Joey, suffered from a kidney condition during the first 5 years of his life. Thankfully, he’s since outgrown it, but at the time, it meant lots of visits to his pediatrician. During these visits, the doctor would invariably test his reflexes by tapping his knees and elbows with a rubber hammer. Joey always demonstrated excellent reflexes. It wasn’t until he was in college that he realized how the reflex test was really supposed to work – you relax your leg (or arm) and it automatically jumps when the doctor hits the right reflex spot. No, what he was doing was purposely extending his leg or arm as fast as he could after the doctor tapped on it. Hey, this was how the doctor could see how fast his reactions (and his reflexes) were…you just never know what’s going on in your child’s mind!

As parents, we commit a lot of accidents when it comes to our children. While walking with our infant in our arms, we accidently turn a corner too sharply and hit our child’s head on the wall. We accidentally forget a child at the park after a soccer game and he ends up running frantically after the van as we’re leaving. We accidentally run over our daughter’s foot with the car after dropping her off at school. We don’t check first and roll the automatic window up in the car only to have your daughter pee in her pants ‘cuz her head is getting stuck in the window. The list can go on and on. I feel especially sorry for our first borns, who must suffer the brunt of our “learn by trial-and-error” methods. (Please note that even though some of the children in the previous examples did suffer minor injuries after said accidents, they have since gone on to thrive and survive.) Thank goodness kids are tough and resilient. Thank goodness they bounce back. Thank goodness we parents don’t scare easily and run off into the woods.

So here’s to parents. Here’s to all of our foibles and follies when it comes to our children. We aren’t perfect. Never will be. All we have is perfect love for our children.